


Hold me in the Winter

by MaxTheHeater



Category: The Last of Us
Genre: #for fun, F/F, First work - Freeform, dance, fluff?, google how to tag, kiss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-26
Updated: 2018-11-28
Packaged: 2019-08-30 00:12:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16754140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaxTheHeater/pseuds/MaxTheHeater
Summary: Ellie is still traumatized from that winter and Wont let anyone help her... Except maybe a particularly bold brunette.





	1. Baby girl

**Author's Note:**

> Heyo. Bet you haven't seen this a hundred times, but this is my first shot at this kinda thing. Not kidding when I say I got the idea from a dream. I'm Mostly gonna write this for fun while I painfully wait for part 2 to come out but if I've got time maybe I'll try this out more.  
> Happy reading, ya morons.

The beginning of winter had always been tough for Ellie. It reminded her of a darker side of herself that, though she wouldn't admit– scared her.

She never even told Joel about everything that happened that day but she knew that he understood. That's one of the things she liked about him. You don't need to tell him for him to get it.

Dina, on the other hand was a completely different story. 

Ellie could remember her first winter back in Jackson, she hadn't left the house for a whole week. Dina had nearly drove Ellie insane asking questions on where she'd been. Ellie couldn't quite find it in herself to relive the memories again, so she said she was sick and didn't want to give it to the rest of the community. Dina, begrudgingly accepted that excuse.

By the second winter she'd been downright suspicious, and each day Joel would ask Ellie when she'd been feeling well enough to go and see Dina again.

“Just tell her I'm sick or something.” She muttered from her bed.

Joel sighed “baby girl..” he ran a hand through his graying hairs. He never had been good at talking about these kind of things, just ask Tommy.

“She's worried about you, kiddo.” He said finally, the silent ' I'm worried too' was register as he started sitting on the bed. He saw Ellie flinch slightly at the sudden weight.

Ellie was silent for a few moments and Joel once again was somewhat glad that Ellie got to that terrible man David, before he did. He'd have made sure it was a slow and painful death for what he'd done to his baby girl.

“I just.. I can't Joel..” she said softly.

He waited for her to continue. She sat up and looked in his eyes. Suddenly she didn't seem like the sixteen year old he'd grown to love as family over the years, she reminded him painfully of Sarah when she was a small child and crawled into his bed after she had a nightmare.

“What if- what if I told her and she saw me differently Joel? What if she's scared of me?” She asked suddenly.

Joel hugged her fiercely then, by pure instinct as if holding her close enough could somehow remove her pain.

“I've seen the way you two are, Ellie. You've been practically inseparable since the day we arrived.” He turned her so she was facing him “Dina knows we've done terrible things. Hell, she knows you're infected. Do you really think she would leave you just because of that one incident?” 

Ellie looked at her palms then, “I guess not” she said slowly, unconvinced.

Joel took this as a small victory and tucked her back into her mound of blankets. 

“G'night baby girl.”

“Thanks, Joel.”

He made a mental note to make sure Dina wouldn't pester Ellie too much once she was back to herself again. With as little death threats as necessary.

To Ellie's surprise the next 2 years went by without even a question of where Ellie had been from Dina.


	2. The Wardrobe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sneaky Dina trying to get Ellie to open up, with poppa Joel helping (and teasing) her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2!! It's kinda bad butt idcc haha such a rebel. 
> 
> Happy reading, ya morons

It was by the time they were 19 when Ellie was starting to worry about winter coming again. She wasn't sure she could hide it from Dina for another year, especially since after her and Jesse had broken up again for about the thousandth time in their on-again off-again relationship, Dina had been with Ellie like a magnet to a fridge. To make matters worse, Dina had figured out the lock on Ellie's window was broken this past summer. So even avoiding her during the worst of it probably wouldn't work.

It was still only early November but Dina had already noticed Ellie becoming more reserved once again, why did she do this every year? Dina knew that obviously something major was up, why else would Joel have told her not to bother Ellie about it?

So, Dina decided it was time for another brilliant plan to try and get Ellie to finally break out of her shell. Though, she thought she'd have earned her trust by now.

On the way back from one of their patrols was when Dina set the trap.

“Hey, you coming to the dance tonight?” She asked.

Ellie looked kind of surprised “uhm probably not I- I have some.. Joel probably has chores he'll need me to help with”

This would be slightly harder than she thought, but by now she knew some little tricks to get Ellie to cave in.

“I call bullshit on that excuse, stretch.” 

“What?! It's not- I'm serious!” She protested.

“Look, I get it. You hate crowds but I've got a surprise for you– but only if you come to the dance.”

Ellie was definitely hooked, Dina could tell.

“I'll.. I'll think about it.” She said finally.

“Great!” She said loudly as she traced a finger on Ellie's cheek “I'd hate for you to miss the fun.” And with that she ran home, leaving a bright red Ellie in her wake.

\-----

Joel turned around quickly when he heard his bedroom door slam open, revealing a red faced and panicked looking Ellie in his doorway. 

Expecting the worst he asked, “El, what's wrong?!”

She dramatically flopped onto his bed and covered her face.

He could barely make out the words through her arm “Dina asked me to go to the dance..”

Joel grinned at this, something he didn't do often even after living in Jackson for so long.  
“What's so bad about that?” 

“I have nothing to wear!” She groaned.

He actually laughed at that, which under normal circumstances Ellie would cherish this moment, but these were not normal circumstances.

“it's not funny, Joel!” She said.

Still chuckling he walked over to his wardrobe. It was admittedly small, but there were a few shirts that he'd never worn because they never fit him. He glanced at Ellie then back at the closet then back at Ellie again.

“What are you doing?” 

“mmhm this'll work.” he said and tossed a blue shirt at her. She quickly put it on.

“Does it look good?” she asked very seriously.

He straightened her collar and ordered her to turn around, nodding slowly “looks good to me. I'll say,” He paused for dramatic affect, “If I didn't know better I'd think you were trying to impress Dina.”

“I am not!” She pushed him lightly, blushing.

He laughed again “alright kiddo, have fun.” He pushed her out the door.

When Joel closed the door Ellie took a deep breath and immediately started to regret actually going through with this. 

It had started to snow, just her luck. Ellie reluctantly started to walk to the town hall, all she had to do was make it a few hours, right?

Besides it's stupid to be afraid of a little snow, she chided herself. She could already hear the sounds of the celebrations from all the way down the road. This kind of thing was made for Dina she chuckled.

With the snow still falling she felt a little more on edge than usual. She couldn't do this.  
It's just a dance she reminded herself.

After standing by the front door without opening it like an idiot for like five minutes, she decided to go for a walk. Maybe by the time she came back it'd be less crowded. Dina probably wouldn't even notice, Jesse would probably be there for her anyway and Ellie would be stuck third wheeling again.


	3. The Dance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ellie finds the courage to go in the dance

Finally the thought of alcohol to keep her distracted from all the horrible things that winter brought was enough to get her to go inside. Stubborn as ever, she still went through the back door so nobody would notice her coming in yet.

She got her drink and watched the crowd, it wasn't long before she saw Dina and some guy dancing and laughing. Huh maybe she has moved on from Jesse. 

Out of habit she checked the exits. Man she hated these things, too many people for her liking. Maybe she got it from Joel.

From the corner of her eye she saw Jesse approach, and shifted so he wouldn't notice her staring at Dina, not that it mattered.

As if voicing her thoughts, Jesse started with “I hate these things”

Ellie wasn't in the mood for talking but he was also her friend so she didn't brush him off completely, “tell me about it.” She muttered, Taking another sip of her drink.

“your old man really laid into me today” he said

She considered this for a second “what happened?”

“Nother big lecture about my patrols, don't go here, don't go there. Funny how involved he gets whenever you're scheduled to go out.”

Classic Joel, overprotective as ever. Sometimes she wondered if he would ever treat her like the nineteen year old that she was. 

“Yeah,” she sighed.

Jesse followed Ellie's line of sight which led to Dina, of course.

“She's putting on quite the show”

Ellie mentally cursed herself, coming here was a bad idea.

As the song ended Ellie started to feel uncomfortable again.

“I give you guys two weeks till you're back together” she said instinctively. For some reason she felt like she was reassuring herself rather than Jesse.

Jesse shook his head, “not gonna happen” he paused as Dina started approaching “she uh, she say something to you?” 

Ellie snorted “make it one week.”

“Ellie! Hey!” Ellie was surprised that Dina was focused on her and not her Jesse, an odd change of events. “What took you so long?” She asked

“Well, I'm here aren't I?” She replied sarcastically.

Dina then grabbed Ellie's drink, finished it for her, and then started pulling Ellie to the dance floor all within the same breath. "C'mon” she said, ignoring Jesse's greeting.

“Hey don't forget we leave at first light so.. get some rest!” Jesse told them.

“Yes, sir!” Dina saluted at him.

“You're such a dick” Ellie told her.

“oh come on, don't you start with me too.”

Dina directed Ellie's hands to her waist and wrapped her own around Ellie's neck, Ellie was pretty sure she'd forgotten how to breathe.

“Okay, I have a very serious question for you” Ellie held her breath once again “how bad do I smell?” 

Okay, not the question she'd been expecting, but Ellie leaned in to sniff her, it felt weird being this close to someone else.

“Like a hot pile of garbage” she teased, Ellie's body tensed up in shock as Dina leaned forward to wipe her sweat off onto Ellie's face.

Pretending she hadn't totally assumed Dina was going to kiss her, which was stupid since she was obviously not into girls–she'd be back with Jesse soon enough– not to mention she and her family were super religious, so Ellie went for the safest humor approach “gross.” 

“You love it,” Dina probably didn't realize how accurate she was, but Ellie's silence probably spoke louder than she intended.

With Dina's head on her shoulder Ellie suddenly felt very self conscious. Her eyes darted around the room checking the exits instinctively. Then she noted all the eyes on the pair of them.

Ellie's breathing quickened when she remembered that every guy their age and probably older too would kill to be in her place right now, she found it ironic that at the moment she would kill to get out of Dina's warm embrace.

“Every guy in this room is staring at you..” 

Dina shifted to look her in the eyes, but Ellie wouldn't look at her.

“Maybe they're staring at you..” the idea was so ridiculous that if Ellie hadn't been on the verge of a panic attack she would have laughed. She shook her head instead.

“They aren't.”

Dina paused and put her head back on her shoulder.

“Maybe they're jealous of you.”

That too was also ridiculous. Dina wasn't hers and they all had more of a chance to get her than Ellie did. Sure, she was in her arms.. and slow dancing to some crappy love song.. but that didn't mean anything. Plus Dina was obviously drunk.

“I'm just a girl..” she thought back to that horrible night “not a threat.” she could almost feel the hands on her neck and the machete back in her hands.

Ellie focused all her attention on the door, she desperately wanted to get fresh air. Maybe Dina could feel her pulling away because she took Ellie by the hand and lead them both out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo yo yo this chapter is basically the E3 trailer that's why I changed it a bit at the end. Honestly don't have a plan for it so I'm not really sure where this story is going (is that a bad thing?)


	4. Sharing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ellie opens up, Dina listens

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey lads n lasses. I decided to make this the last chapter cuz I felt like it fit well. Dunno if it's good or not but it works. (Thanks for everyone who left a Kudos, was shook when I noticed them)
> 
> Happy reading, ya morons!

The night had only gotten colder after Ellie went inside, and Ellie swore she could feel her bones freezing.

At least it was only lightly snowing.. She remembered back in the cannibals town she couldn't even see two feet in front of herself. That day had truly been the most terrifying of her life. Even more than getting bit. At least then she could see what was happening.

The worst part of it all was that if she hadn't been so stupid and gone after that deer she wouldn't gotten into that situation in the first place, Joel might not be alive right now. That dumbass David had actually helped her save the most important person in her life and she hated that she had to be grateful to him in some way for it.

Ellie didn't even notice Dina was talking to her until she felt a couch and realized Dina had taken her back to her place. How fast had they walked?

Ellie looked over at Dina and found it discomforting but also adorable that her eyebrows were all scrunched up as she looked at Ellie worriedly.

“What's wrong?” Ellie asked finally.

Dina put on an amused face and shook her head, “I was about to ask you the same thing.”

“What do you mean? Everything's great!” She lied.

Dina simply rolled her eyes and said, “I really hope you didn't think that would fool me.” She pointed at Ellie's hands, they way that Ellie was tugging on her finger “you only do that when you're nervous.”

Dina was smart, she had to give her that. But that just meant she was stuck between telling her the truth, or leaving the country. Both of which were not very good options.

“So you noticed, huh?”

“Well, yea. Last week you were telling jokes and planning to convince Joel to get a puppy, and today you've hardly even spoken to me.” She said with a frown.

Ellie wasn't sure if Dina meant to make her feel guilty or not, but either way it worked. For some reason her mind brought her back to Dina complaining about Jesse not talking to her.

Suddenly she felt Dina sitting right beside her and held her hand.

“I don't like winter” she said knowing full well that Dina’s response would be.

A hand smacked her lightly on the arm “no way! I haven't noticed in the past 5 years!”

Ellie laughed despite herself “ well shit, if every time I try to tell you something this is going to happen then what's the point?”

That sobered Dina up pretty quickly “alright, go on.”

Ellie licked her lips, she wasn't really sure what to say. Or rather, how to say it.

“It's kind of stupid, really.” She sighed.

Dina shook her head “no, Ellie. If it bothers you then it's important to me.”

Ellie looked Dina in the eyes to see if she was joking or not. She'd never really had someone think she was important other than Joel. She was surprised to see the seriousness in Dina’s eyes. Normally she never took anything serious.

“Ok well..” She felt Dina's arm rubbing her back “you remember how I told you Joel got hurt real bad?” Dina nodded “well.. He was out of it for a long time. I've never felt so alone, I was sure each day that he'd die and I'd have no one left..” She was surprised she was crying when she felt Dina gently wipe her tears.

“One time I was out hunting for food, I was going to go back to Joel when I saw a deer. I was so stupid.. I thought if I killed it he'd be proud or something. “

She stared at the fire for a minute, collecting her thoughts.

“You don't have to tell me if you don't want to Ellie..” Dina said softly in her ear.

“No I'm good.. It's good.” She fiddled with her fingers again, “I did get it eventually, but these two assholes wanted it too, David and James. Said they had starving women and children.” Dina didn't miss how Ellie's voice hardened, it was like she was detached from her words.

“David sent his guy to go get me some antibiotics, for Joel. We got swarmed by infected, he saved my life a few times, so I stupidly trusted him” she laughed coldly.

“Then he started telling me how ‘everything happens for a reason’ and told me a story about a crazy old man and a little girl who killed a shit ton of his men,” 

Dina looked oddly proud, “you and Joel?”

Ellie nodded slowly. 

“He let me go after that. I couldn't believe it.. I couldn't erase my tracks back to Joel and they followed me the next day..” she trailed off, remembering Callus. He was a good horse, and it had been her fault that he died.

“They turned out to be cannibals” she just wanted this conversation to be over.

“Tried to eat me, so I killed em all.” She shrugged like it was no big deal. As if she hadn't had nightmares almost every day for the past 5 years.

“I can still see him when I close my eyes. I stabbed him over and over and over. Wasn't even a face anymore.” She sighed. “Joel stopped me, eventually. And now.. we're here.” she said spreading her arms out.

“Oh Ellie..” Dina hugged her, which was kind of awkward because of their position on the couch. But that didn't stop Ellie's heart rate from increasing.

“Thank you, for telling me” she said softly.

Ellie had always been told that telling people things made it seem better, but she hadn't actually thought it would work.  
Suddenly Ellie remembered the whole reason she wasn't at home tonight.

“So.. what's the surprise?” She asked, noticing the way Dina's cheeks got a pink tint to them.

“Well.. you did come to the dance..” Dina said slowly.

“I'd say that's a big step for little old me”

“Yea, I still can't believe the world's most talkative infected girl is anti-social.” Dina teased.

Then she leaned in, and their lips locked.

Ellie almost pinched herself, but that would have probably ruined the moment. Dina pulled back a little, to see if Ellie was ok with it. This time, Ellie closed the distance. For the first time in 5 years, she couldn't remember that winter.

 

Though, to be fair she couldn't remember her own name either.

 

THE END


End file.
